Today we are taking a look back on 2019. I love doing these kinds of posts, looking back on my year and acknowledging my growth and highlighting the best moments from it. I hope y’all enjoy!
How Did I Grow?
Going into 2019, I didn’t have any specific goals in mind. In past years, I always had resolutions but this was the first year I didn’t, and I think that’s ok. Going into 2020 I don’t have any goals either. I take life as it comes and learn lessons as they appear in my life. I don’t put pressure on myself to have ideas in mind for the new year.
In 2019 I overcame my fear of the dentist. This is going to sound bad, because it is, but I didn’t go to the dentist for years. I was absolutely afraid of the dentist because of past traumatic situations in my childhood. It was my goal for 2019 to finally go again and go face to face with that fear. Let me tell you, I had so much dental work done this year that I don’t think I will ever be afraid again. I got it ALL. I took that first leap at the beginning of the year in January to get a cleaning and now I’m a pro. I’m proud of myself for facing my fear and now I’m not afraid of the doctor or dentist.
I started standing up for myself. I can be a very timid and quiet person. I’m a really kind person too, so I let people take advantage of me or walk all over me. This year I started putting my foot down and confronting those who were using me. I started standing up for myself and I’m just really proud. It takes a lot of strength and courage to do it.
I officially drove to LA by myself. I did drive to and from LA last year, but it was for a concert only so I didn’t really count it. I finally went to LA by myself and drove to a bunch of different locations. I didn’t die. I didn’t get a ticket. I didn’t have a panic attack. It was a huge win for me.
I went to a general admission concert, stood 2nd row, and didn’t have a panic attack. My first two experiences with general admission concerts led me to having panic attacks back in high school. I was worried I’d have one again this year at the Sabrina Carpenter concert, but I didn’t. How amazing.
I trusted in the universe to make the best decisions for me. Picking a sofority felt like a life or death situation. I was so overwhelmed and was so scared I’d make the wrong decision. Choosing my big was another overwhelming decision that was hard to make. I did what felt right in my gut, and then trusted in the universe to have the best intentions for me. I believe everything happens for a reason and that the universe always wants the best for you. I did that and both outcomes were incredible and I couldn’t be happier.
I started a bucket list. I want to meet all of my favorite artists and thank them in person. I want to go to every Disney park in the world. I want to go to all of the major concert venues in LA. It’s fun to have little goals to accomplish over time. I never had a bucket list before because I never knew what I’d put on it, but now mine is slowly growing.
Highlights of 2019
I joined a sorority! I joined Gamma Phi Beta and finally found my home away from home in Santa Barbara. It took long enough to finally fall in love with this place. I’ve found sisters who I can depend on. I’ve found beauty in Santa Barbara itself. Things are looking up.
I finally saw Jon Bellion after waiting 3 years. I became a fan in 2016 and had been waiting ever since then to see him perform live. I got VIP, and my mom and I got to see him perform. It was an amazing night I will never forget. Also, it was at The Greek Theatre, which I had never been to before. It was one of the venues on my bucket list. Fun fact and crazy how the universe works, I wanted to go to a LANY concert that was going to be at The Greek Theatre, but I decided not to go because it was going to be the same exact concert as the one I went to twice last year. So I decided not to go and I told myself and my family that if it was meant to be, then either Sabrina Carpenter or Jon Bellion would perform at that same venue later on and I’d still have the chance to go. It happened!!! Crazy.
I met Sabrina Carpenter and saw her perform for the first time. I love this girl so much and I got to tell her in person how much I love her. I got to have a great night dancing and screaming to all of the songs.
Looking back on 2019, I feel like I had a lot of good times. This is probably the first year in a while that I’ve felt content with the past year. I’m not so desperate for a new year and a new change, but I am always excited for one.